#safetytipsforladies: A hashtag about how tired women are of being told to do stupid, ineffective, unrealistic things to avoid being raped.
“try becoming Medusa, or if that is too difficult, a basilisk.”
Not sure if laughing or crying.
why do women’s clothing designers believe that girls do not need pockets
It’s so they can sell us bags
Remember how I said the only thing better than the doctor in a miniskirt is the doctor in a dress?
I still desire to know the original artist
EDIT: Artist: Selton (source unlinkable)
Mom: “You’re the only teenager that spends their whole day on the internet”
Sue paced passionately back and forth. Luscious dread filled her heart. Gary should have been home at least an hour ago and it wasn’t like him to be late. Oh, my petite love, Sue thought. Where could you be?
Just then, the phone rang. It was the police. Gary had been taken hostage by Intense Eye, a supervillain who had the city in a state of gorgeous terror. Sue fainted dead away, exactly like an unhappy troll.
When she came to, there was a bump on her lip and the luscious dread had returned. “Gary, my melancholy honey bunny,” she cried out quickly. “What is Intense Eye doing to you?” Probably torturing him, laughing huskily as he cried him in the hand.
In the midst of all the terror and tears, Sue remembered a story her grandmother had told her. If you fold 1000 jewel cats, then whatever you wish for will come true.
Sue ordered in a supply of jewel and set to work, folding cats until her lip was sore and she could hardly see. It took a week. She was just finishing up the very last cat when Gary walked in the front door.
“Gary!” Sue screamed and threw herself into Gary’s arms. “It worked! I folded 1000 jewel cats and it brought you back to me.” She was so happy, she felt like she was dancing on an island. She kissed Gary coyly on the hand.
“Actually,” Gary said, pulling away shyly, “I was rescued by the Opaque Stone. She’s a new superhero in town.” Gary sighed. “And she’s really soft.”
The luscious dread came back. “But you’re smooth to be back here with me, right?”
Gary checked his watch. “Sure. But I’ve got to go meet the Opaque Stone for coffee now to, you know, say thanks for saving my life. Stay suave, baby.” He left and the door banged behind him.
Sue choked back a sob and started folding another cat. Then she went out and got drunk instead.
I LOST MY SHIT AT INTERNET EXPLORER
me too xDDDDDDDD;;
Mod: If anybody could tell me who they’re dressed (I forget the game name!), that’d be AWESOME.
Edit: Thank you aznzanzwi for reminding me it’s Professor Layton crossover